HL Paradise Island

I honestly don’t know how this hotel has the rating it does. Love holidays claim it’s a 4*. Within the first 24 hours we’d visited reception four times. By the end of the holiday, we were on first-name terms with the staff.

Within the first day we made four separate trips to reception:

• The shower drain was blocked, flooding the entire bathroom.
• The air conditioning remote was missing.
• The safe was… well, missing entirely.
• The electronic door lock stopped working, leaving us unable to get into the room.

The food deserves a special mention, and not in a good way. It was repetitive, poor quality and honestly some of the worst all-inclusive food I’ve had. Every meal felt like yesterday’s leftovers had simply been rearranged into a different tray.

Cleanliness throughout the hotel was shockingly poor. Someone dropped a burger on the public pathway outside our room. Seven days later, that burger had apparently become a permanent hotel feature. I was half expecting it to receive its own room number.

The public areas weren’t much better. One evening we spent around 20 minutes trying to find a table and chairs that weren’t covered in food or drink spillages. Eventually we gave up and went back to our room. Other guests were also complaining about finding cockroaches in their rooms, which certainly didn’t inspire confidence.

The pool was advertised as being cleaned daily, but there was visible debris in the water throughout our stay. The “no reserving sunbeds with towels” policy also appears to exist purely for decoration. By early morning most loungers had already been claimed, and with around half of them broken anyway, finding somewhere to sit became a daily competition.

The lifeguard’s setup was equally concerning. They were positioned around 10 metres away from the pool with a limited view of only part of it, and on several occasions seemed more interested in looking at their phone than watching the swimmers.

The hotel also has a general unpleasant smell in many areas, which probably isn’t helped by the lack of cleanliness and maintenance. Everywhere you look there are cracked tiles, ripped seating, broken sun loungers and facilities that desperately need attention. It feels tired, neglected and in serious need of investment.

The only positive was the location, as Playa Blanca itself is lovely. Unfortunately, the hotel was such a disappointment that we found ourselves spending as much time away from it as possible.

I wouldn’t return, and I certainly wouldn’t recommend it.

Booked through ‘On the Beach’. To you directly, you cannot have had any member of your staff visit this hotel and rated this as 4 star. If you have, you need to retrain that member of staff immediately. The hotel is falling to bits. It doesn’t look like it’s had a penny spent on the rooms in the last 30 years bar a lick of paint and a small flat screen TV. The patio door onto the balcony was falling to bits and it was a struggle to open it. The table and chairs on our balcony looked like they had been bought from an auction of a run down bar. The table was fit for the skip. Paint on the settee and balcony chairs for when they have run round with a brush and tub of white wash. The bathroom sink tap looks like it’s got growth on it. The whole hotel feels grubby everywhere you go. Cigarette butts in the flower beds outside the rooms, the same around the pool. Pool side area sun beds were filthy and falling apart. Pool side bar staff were good and worked extremely hard but are woefully understaffed for the amount of people here which lead to poor conditions at the bar. One highlight was the food and drink. I didn’t struggle choice and the chefs were doing an excellent job and made really tasty food. That along with the hotel booze is what is basically stopping a riot from starting. The dining area was like a cattle market and the noise in there was deafening at times. The cutlery was the cheapest stuff you can find and if you applied pressure, you could have severed a finger as the edges felt sharp. In its current state, you are hard pushed to give this a 3 start hotel rating and that would be incredibly generous. To back this up we were not the only people completely disappointed with the hotel as there was a constant stream of disgruntled holiday makers making their opinions known at the reception. It sounds as though we ended up with a half decent room compared to others. This is definitely NOT a value for money holiday. On the Beach should hang their heads in shame taking their customer hard earned cash from them and sending them to this hell hole!

It’s Not as Bad as Some People Make Out

We’ve just returned from 10 days at Paradise Island. While I wouldn’t rate it as the advertised 4-star hotel, it's probably closer to a 3-star we went with an open mind after reading some of the reviews and had a good holiday.

The rooms are spacious but definitely in need of some TLC. That said, the housekeeping staff work hard to keep them clean and tidy. There were eight of us travelling together, and I emailed the hotel beforehand to request that our three rooms be close together, upstairs, and in a quieter area. They accommodated this request, which we really appreciated. The beds are very firm, but if you ask at reception, they'll provide a mattress topper.

The food was perfectly acceptable. Even the fussiest eater in our group always found something to enjoy, and the drinks were fine too. The only downside was the reception bar, which usually have just one member of staff, so queues could be quite long.

The biggest issue for us was that the pools, amphitheatre, and entertainment areas simply aren't big enough for a hotel of this size. During busy periods, it felt overcrowded.

The staff work incredibly hard to keep the resort clean, but unfortunately some guests don't help by leaving litter behind. There are bins everywhere, so it's disappointing to see people not using them.

The Dino Park was a huge hit with the children. The lifeguards deserve a special mention—they were attentive, professional, and did a fantastic job looking after everyone's safety, both the little ones and the "big kids"!

Would I return? No. However, if you have children who love water slides and splash parks, I'd recommend Paradise Island as they'll have an amazing time.